You know you've been watching too much Rome (HBO)when..

You know you've been watching too much Rome when..

• You know you've done one or more on the list below. Be honest. After all denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
  
  You lament that no one serves good dormouse anymore.
• 
  Wusses are now referred to as having a “feminine anima.”
• 
  More than once you have tried to turn our sheets into a toga.
• 
  Instead of using the expletive “Shit” you use “Cac.”
• 
  Instead of “Oh my God” you say “Bona Dea!.”
• 
  When presented with a conundrum your first words are ‘Now there’s the onion.”
• 
  When seeking agreement you end your query with “Neh?”
• 
  You refer to your better half as domina or dominus.
• 
  Instead of emailing your co-workers you nail correspondence to their office door.
• 
  While tracing your family’s ancestry you secretly hope that you are patrician and your associates are plebs.
• 
  After a particularly spectacular coupling you tell your partner they were either hotter than Vulcan’s dick or Helen of Troy with her ass on fire.
• 
  You have legally added “us” or “ius” to your surname.
• 
  Your new form of punishment for your enemies is scourging and crucifixion.
• 
  Now you share news of whom you’ve penetrated with your mother.
• 
  You now consider thirteen to be a lucky number.
• 
  You’re willing to do whatever it takes to earn a triumph.
• 
  Your pockets when emptied contain the phallus of your enemy.
• 
  You avoid chores by saying “Not while I’m under the standard.”
• 
  You ask for directions to Subura because that is where the cleanest brothels are.
• 
  You have taken to sleeping on your boss’s front steps.
• 
  It now takes a bit of wine to set you up for the morning.
• 
  You think of the Gauls as cheese eating surrender monkeys.
• 
  Your new pick up line is “A large penis is always welcome.”
  
  http://boards.hbo.com/thread.jspa?threadID=600004235&tstart=55&start=-1