Mid-July post

I feel a sudden loss of direction, not in a bad way, though. I have two weeks of relative freedom ahead of me, and the sense of no stress, no dead-lines, no pressure is almost too much to bare. Just went on retreat for a couple of days. It's confirmed, I'm somewhat and somehow programmed and uncapable of connecting with the mitras. Except for one or two, of course. The main reason behind it, I gather, is my unaccessibility, both personal and factual. There's four Dharmacharis who will have a more active role with the GFR Mitra Sangha, but not me. I see two very stressful years ahead of me. In August I'm starting my Masters' at the UNAM: three seminars, lots of research, lots of reading, lots of writing, very little time for distractions. Plus I have my 10-3 work and my various others means to get some $. I'm sorry mitras, I won't be there for you. Can barely breath with the input I already have. Next week I'm off to Linares, Northern Mexico, to give a talk on Goya, should be fun. I'll spend the weekend working on the talk. And I seriously have to start thinking on my dissertation, which I have to defend in exactly two years, and time flies mercilessly. Better go now. I feel "pressured" to go to sleep.